Zendikar: In the Teeth of Akoum: A Magic: The Gathering Set Novel Review & Ratings

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Zendikar: In the Teeth of Akoum: A Magic: The Gathering Set Novel Review

Review may contain a few small spoilers.
The first thing I have to ask about this book is who in the heck edited it? Nobody? It certainly seems that way. From beginning to end, the book is riddled with typographical errors, misplaced punctuation, misspelled words, improperly used words, and just a general disregard for grammar and syntax. It looks like a first draft to me - like Robert B. Wintermute just sat down and sneezed this thing out and that was it.
The second thing I want to point out is that the author clearly didn't realize that one of the defining attributes of the Zendikar set was NOT Nissa Revane and her elves - it was the addition of Sorin Markov, the Vampire planeswalker, and the addition of so many good, playable vampires. What was one of the first spoiled cards from Zendikar? Sorin. Who's on the cardboard standees for this set?? Sorin. Who's on all the promo posters?? Sorin. NOBODY CARES ABOUT NISSA REVANE. It totally baffles me that this entire story is written in third person limited omniscience from Nissa's point of view. It's like... What was Wintermute thinking? That people were buying the book to read about her? No, you dolt, we want to read more about Sorin. If he had to write it in third person from essentially Nissa's point of view, could he have least written it with total omniscience? We get no insight into Sorin's thoughts, or Anowon's. I hate limited omniscience. We want to read about Sorin. It's not even "revealed" that he's a vampire until somewhere around Chapter 18. (Of course, if you're reading this book, odds are rather great that you already KNOW that he's a vampire....)
The same words and exchanges are used repeatedly throughout the book. A lot of times he'll use the same phrase or adjective over and over in the space of one or two paragraphs. Also, I can't even remember how many times this took place:
1. Nissa says something obvious/annoying/unimportant.
2. Sorin says something akin to "Way to go, Captain Obvious."
3. "Nissa ignored him."
Nissa ignored him. Nissa ignored him. Nissa ignored him. That's another thing I couldn't stand. Nissa constantly ignored Sorin. Not only does she ignore him, after multiple displays of pure ownage on Sorin's part (though these became woefully few and far between through the book. Time and time again I would brace myself for Sorin to do something totally awesome, only to have it come to nothing), Nissa is still second guessing him. In her very first meeting with him, the first thing she sees him do is walk brazenly up to a massive number of brood lineage and just rot them all in a second. Even after Sorin tells her more about what he's doing there and what the Eldrazi will do if they get out, it's like she has this great hollow devoid of gray matter between her ears. She must think Sorin is just making it all up.
One thing I hate about this book is how the author portrayed Sorin Markov. Sorin is thousands of years old. He's older than Ajani, Jace, Liliana, Chandra, Garruk, Elspeth, Sarkhan, Tezzeret, Nissa and Gideon combined. The only planeswalker who trumps Sorin in age is Nicol Bolas. If the mana or whatever of Zendikar is somehow weakening him it should be obvious that he isn't functioning at "full power" but instead the vampire planeswalker is practically portrayed as plucky comic relief. He remains a relatively flat character throughout the story who makes quips and one-liners and basically just stands around while Nissa and Anowon talk until he can't stand it anymore before he says "Okay, that's great but can we get going now?" In a number of instances, Sorin just gets knocked unconscious by stuff like the Roil, and I can only assume that it's because Wintermute can't write action for more than one character simultaneously. He's also way too easily jabbed at for one who's supposedly been around for so long - one second he'll be making a joke and smiling, then Anowon will say something aimed at "getting to" him, and lo and behold, it does. His smile disappears and he just glares. He does this any time someone responds poorly to his jives. He just seems like a joke throughout the book and to be honest, he should have just killed Nissa.
I did like Anowon's character and the way he and Sorin interacted. I do wish that the way Anowon was developed had been the way he'd developed Sorin, especially since Anowon and Nissa seem to do a lot more conversing than Sorin and Nissa.
The end of the book was extremely unsatisfying, but I won't go into great detail because who knows, someone out there might just want to read it.

Zendikar: In the Teeth of Akoum: A Magic: The Gathering Set Novel Overview

For gamers and fantasy fans alike, a fast-paced, stand-alone adventure that bringsthe popular trading card game Magic: the Gathering® to life. Lurking in the spacebetween the aether and the physical plane, there is a great evil waiting to emerge. Zendikar is a land of danger and adventure, a world of deadly risks and pricelessrewards.It is also a prison to one of the most deadly species known to the Multiverse:the dreaded Eldrazi. When our story opens, part of the mystical containment spellthat has kept the Eldrazi captive for millennia has been breached.The brood lineage,the Eldrazi minions, have been released and are poring over the plane, devouringeverything in their path, but the swath they cut across the land is nothing nextto the destruction that the still-imprisoned Eldrazi Titans will wreck once released. Nissa Revane, a planeswalker and proud elf warrior of the Jorga Nation, is witnessto what the brood lineage can do.She sees that they pose a bigger problem thanmost suppose. Sorin, an ancient vampire planeswalker, knows this as well as anyonebecause he was among the original jailers of the ancient scourge. He has returnedto Zendikar to make sure the Titans do not escape. They both want the Eldarzi threatextinguished but each has their own agenda.Nissa wants the Eldrazi off her planeentirely. Sorin wants to put the lock back on their cell. And there are still otherswho want the Titans to escape. Together they set out across the land on search ofthe Eye of Ugin, the source of the Eldrazi uprising, where they will face what couldbe their final challenge. Will the Eldrazi escape to menace the Multiverse once again?

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